Texts From Last Night · theram's Favorites

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theram's Favorites Texts:

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(239): View more from Florida

My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.

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(305): View more from Florida

what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose

Fav 9 1702 4290
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(516): View more from New York

why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?

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(219): View more from Indiana

He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever

Fav 51 11500 1752
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(817): View more from Texas

You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.

Fav 15 1385 4072
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(414): View more from Wisconsin

I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them

Fav 56 5315 1013
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