Texts From Last Night · kirtap145's Favorites

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kirtap145's Favorites Texts:

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes

Fav 1 110 15
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.

Fav 1 20 96
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.

(1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

classic

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol

Fav 2 64 66
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(304): View more from West Virginia

He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.

Fav 4 88 18
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(281): View more from Texas

I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.

Fav 4 101 9
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