Texts From Last Night · olddirtycrayon's Favorites

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olddirtycrayon's Favorites Texts:

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(702): View more from Nevada

I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.

Fav 6 2450 1271
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(701): View more from North Dakota

does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?

Fav 56 7377 2498
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(251): View more from Alabama

Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.

Fav 18 5297 1299
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(301): View more from Maryland

I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes

Fav 32 5913 1449
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(606): View more from Kentucky

Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.

Fav 16 2273 872
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(817): View more from Texas

Midnight walks are trippy

(1-817): View more from Texas

I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.

Fav 9 3861 927
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(607): View more from New York

It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.

(1-607): View more from New York

I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling

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