Texts From Last Night · Dagger's Favorites

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Dagger's Favorites Texts:

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(813): View more from Florida

I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.

Fav 6 481 996
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(213): View more from California

She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.

Fav 1 813 622
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(727): View more from Florida

Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.

Fav 9 1470 779
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(563): View more from Iowa

I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.

Fav 9 823 645
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(586): View more from Michigan

I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.

Fav 2 1116 658
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(316): View more from Kansas

She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.

Fav 13 1011 2326
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(310): View more from California

I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected

(1-310): View more from California

Only you would come out as bi like that

Fav 2 1036 532
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(+61): View more from Australia

it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'

Fav 4 1673 719
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