Texts From Last Night · HarleyQ_33's Favorites

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HarleyQ_33's Favorites Texts:

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(415): View more from California

I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?

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(+43): View more from

After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.

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(541): View more from Oregon

Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.

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(214): View more from Texas

So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.

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(816): View more from Missouri

At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.

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(807): View more from Ontario

I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.

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(816): View more from Missouri

believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.

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