Texts From Last Night · Batjackson's Favorites

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Batjackson's Favorites Texts:

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(320): View more from Minnesota

I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.

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(252): View more from North Carolina

They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.

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(936): View more from Texas

I AM VODKA MAN

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(678): View more from Georgia

Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.

(1-678): View more from Georgia

I want to change all my life goals to that.

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(614): View more from Ohio

So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?

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(312): View more from Illinois

My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.

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(818): View more from California

We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.

(619): View more from California

I will find you...

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(734): View more from Michigan

my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW

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