Texts From Last Night · Mordred47's Favorites

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Mordred47's Favorites Texts:

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(325): View more from Texas

Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.

Fav 0 639 393
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(519): View more from Ontario

How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..

(1-519): View more from Ontario

Not very gracefully, that's how.

Fav 1 787 438
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(402): View more from Nebraska

Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.

(779): View more from Illinois

YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.

Fav 4 707 924
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(630): View more from Illinois

Of course I have a pirate flag

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(270): View more from Kentucky

I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."

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(419): View more from Ohio

I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila

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(706): View more from Georgia

To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.

(1-706): View more from Georgia

You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.

(706): View more from Georgia

Touche.

Fav 4 1428 832
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(206): View more from Washington

Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars

Fav 1 824 585
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