Texts From Last Night · JustTooSaxy's Favorites

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JustTooSaxy's Favorites Texts:

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(807): View more from Ontario

If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right

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(702): View more from Nevada

I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.

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(517): View more from Michigan

She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...

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(260): View more from Indiana

apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"

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(919): View more from North Carolina

The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.

(1-919): View more from North Carolina

and you succeeded.

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(585): View more from New York

I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"

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(727): View more from Florida

and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos

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(+61): View more from Australia

woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME

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